arielle elise » arielle elise photography

being real.

i feel as though a big down side to blogging or writing online is not being real. of course on a blog, you can be real to some extent but you have the choice and can choose just how “real” you want to be. i think being artistic in any way makes this a little harder. life is sometimes a mess yet beautiful in all its imperfections. for instance, i could put a picture up on my blog of jay and i smiling, looking happy yet leave out that we were arguing about money this week. i could post a picture of leland laughing, yet totally leave out all the other times he was whining or crying as we went down the aisles of the grocery store.

i think it’s good to be careful when posting on blogs to not portray that we lead a little perfect life because, friends, that is just not reality. it sets others up for discontentment and high expectations. i do love posting pictures of our family and will continue to do so but let me be honest: at  least every other day i’m in sweats or yoga pants with my hair up in a messy bun. yes, it would be great to wear pretty headbands, little dresses, and lovely shoes everyday. but to me, honestly…that’s not real life. maybe it is for some, but for me…it isn’t.

i suppose in reality, it all comes down to caring what others think and how they perceive us. being real isn’t always easy but i think that it is good. if i’m fixing my eyes on Christ, i will want my life to be transparent.  i won’t care if others see my imperfections, my weaknesses, and the trials and lessons that i am learning in life. it won’t matter if others see me as “religious” but see more of a girl who loves Jesus and wants to be authentic and real. i want to stay grounded and not write about things that are only on the surface. things that are on the surface- materialism and appearance- will not last. materialism, shopping, style, clothes, the latest food trend, clothing trend, makeup regimes…they will all fade. the Lord looks at the heart- He looks at my heart. and so for me to try and portray something that i am not, is wrong. i am learning on this journey….and am reminded again and again to be real (and look decent in my forever 21 sweatpants) along the way :)

love,
arielle

  

Thanks for being real & posting this… I am constantly doing the same, striving to be real…. blogging/ sharing my struggles, heartaches, and so on. bless you.
-Amy

I LOVE this post! It’s so true! I’ve been drafting something similar to this for my own site. I’ve wanted to write about it for a while, but every post I write doesn’t articulate what I want to say in just the right way. I love the blogging community and I’ve found the blogs I love the most are the ones who tell me about the good and the bad … not just the “amazing”.

This is EXACTLY what I’ve been feeling/thinking lately. You worded it beautifully! I love this post!

I really love this post because I’ve been in a serious funk lately and I just wrote about it yesterday on my blog. I’ve been really struggling with getting down on myself lately – I’m too fat, I have bad skin, etc. And I’m sure more of this stems from being a part of the blogging world than I’d like to admit. I know nobody’s perfect, but sometimes you look at other people and can’t help but wish you had some quality they had. It’s a constant struggle. But I’m trying! Thanks for this!

so true!!! It is also true to be careful how much we share of our life for all the internet to see :) p.s If I am being honest I only really get dressed up on Sundays :)

You put into words what I couldn’t. I’ve been struggling with this a lot lately — because while I think there’s nothing wrong with focusing on the positive things, it’s so easy to fall in the trap of jealousy. I don’t blog about the tears and meltdowns and fights, but just because they’re not there doesn’t mean they’re not part of my life. Thank you for this, Arielle.

I could not agree more with this beautiful post, arielle. I am constantly questioning and searching for how to just be me on my blog. What I post is not fake, but like you’re saying its not always the whole truth. Thanks for always being so open and honest.

My Beautiful Life

You are so sweet, and honest, Arielle. That is why we love you so. You are right- it is easy to portray when things are going swimmingly well, and leave out all the craziness in the background.

Thanks for keeping it real honey.

Ashley

I could not agree with you more! You are so wise for being such a young age. I very much enjoy reading your blog. And, your pictures with Leland are absolutely adorable!

beautiful post Arielle! I could definitely stretch myself in this area!

What a well written post. I could not agree more. Sometimes I read these blogs and Im like WOW their life is just perfect..but no ones life is picture perfect. It makes then un relate-able. I try to be as real as I can with my writing..and sometimes showing or sharing REAL things about me or my life. I also think there is a fine line between being real and those bloggers that share too much and complain about everything..so its really all about balance in my opinion :)

This is so encouraging and you nailed it right on the head. I was just having a conversation with a girlfriend about just this topic yesterday… in so many ways, we only see the “glamorized” version of people’s lives via Facebook, Blogs or Twitter… but the truth is life is hard and most don’t show that. Thanks for keeping it real! Keep up the amazing work and to God be the glory!
-Heather

I appreciate you so much, Arielle. It’s easy to read other blogs and feel discontent and wrapped up in the things of this world and that’s not how I want to be. It’s almost like people can make themselves into some kind of celebrity. Thank you for being real.

I love your posts.
girl, you rock!

___________________________________
http://mustbeliberating.blogspot.com/

Preach it, girlfriend! =) Being real is the best. It’s very liberating. . . but also very difficult at times… because, as females, we tend to want our lives to seem prettier than what they truly are.
One of my favorite Bible verses keeps me in check all the time:
“Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.”
-Proverbs 31:30

Can you get out my head? I’m with you 100%!

This is one of the reasons husband and I don’t agree often when it comes to blogging. Not so much my posts but the energy I put into other peoples lives wondering why mine doesn’t stack up. Because of this, I have thought about stopping blogging altogether, but I do love the creative outlet it gives me. I pray everyday for God to give me the balance and wisdom it takes to not focus so much on everyone else’s clothes, looks or “real life” but focus and accentuate the blessings right in front me. I think I might have to do a post. Thanks for the inspiration.

Talk about timing- I was just thinking about this same topic today after reading a certain blog.

I know I am going to try my hardest not to pretend that my life doesn’t have bumps and snags when I write.

Gracias lil lady!

erica

thanks arielle!
i have loved reading your blog for the past couple of months for all the thoughtful posts much like this one. though i am not a christian (or of any particular religion), i admire and respect the words and wisdom of Jesus Christ and appreciate the very thoughtful passages that you highlight.

your pure heart, devotion to your path, your family , your kindness, your transparency (which you have without trying) makes you a true blessing to this sometimes troubled world.

thank you for such an honest, thought-provoking post. i have been guilty of only blogging about the “good stuff”– it’s so much easier than writing about “real life”.

You’re so cute! I love your honesty. I have no doubt that you lead a very real and normal life and haven’t ever thought you portrayed anything less. I think I show my bad side often enough on my blog. It’s too hard to ‘pretend’ in my eyes, it’s much easier to tell it as I am not leaving the not so attractive side of me out. That’s what makes me me.

He loves us regardless, and His opinion is all that matters. :)

I love this post! I have to be honest sometimes it is overwhelming to follow and read so many blogs. Sometimes it does feel like everyone else is living a perfect little life and the mess you are in feels so much greater than it really is because you spend so much time comparing yourself to others. This post is a great reminder! :)

love it.
i absolutely love hearing what you have to say & find myself nodding while reading, a lot.
so happy to be blog friends!
love, leigh

I think that’s what makes or breaks a blogger: the ability to BE real. Truthfully, I don’t read blogs that come across as perfect. I prefer the ones who admit to their flaws, their mistakes and their shortcomings. Keep being you, girl. Sweatpants and all. :)

Michelle

Just like everyone else said.. you have said this perfectly. Those people that are real – those are the ones you want to read about and follow because you can relate to them. It’s nice to feel refreshed and know that you are not alone in a journey. :)

Beautifully said! And really just being ourselves is actually so refreshing. I’m finding that as I get a bit older (turning 30 soon!) I’m learning who I am and embracing the women that God made me to be….

Thank you for your authenticity! I appreciate when sisters in Christ value being genuine over appearing “perfect” all the time, because the truth is that we are all a messy, broken, and sinful race of people. It’s only in Christ that we are made perfect – and that kind of perfection really doesn’t look “perfect”! Being real is so much more relatable and appealing, so thank you for being real!

i really love this post. well said and it couldn’t be more true. thanks for sharing :)

Oh I just love this because it is so true. I’ve stopped following some blogs because I feel like the writers were trying to look perfect and there just is no such thing as a perfect human being! (Well, except for Jesus Christ of course, but you know what I mean.)
Keep up the honest work!

I am very thankful for your honesty. I have had to weed out the blogs that caused me to become dissatisfied with my life. It’s easy to get caught up in! It is refreshing to see a REAL person show through all the photos and words.

I hope you and your family have a wonderful day…in the midst of sweatpants, messy buns and all of life’s little imperfections! :)

WOW. That is so so true – a great challenge for us to each be a little bit more real!

AMEN! Thank you for this post! I agree completely. That’s why I only post outfits maybe once week. I don’t look cute all the time and sometimes I might like ok but just don’t want to be photographed.

i love this post. i absolutely feel the same way. i want my blog to be light and carefree some days, but other days i want to open my heart. i’ve been really careful to not let my negative emotions fill up my blog, but when i’m hurting or sad, i love writing about it because it shows people that i’m a real person, with real emotions. it also is an outlet for me, and as i write, i realize how blessed i am. i am reminded how Jesus picks me up when i’m weak and He gives me His strength. i want my blog to encourage others and point them to Jesus. that is my heart :)

Let me just thank you for being so honest about the difficulty in being “real”. That has been such a desire on my heart these past months and I am finding that each day it is a choice to be transparent with others. I feel like God has been showing me other women with the same desire for authenticity and I am so grateful for your vulnerability to speak out about this as well!

I love this post! I think being real is so important. I’ll be honest, I do have a tendency to believe that a lot of bloggers have great relationships, that their lives are perfect all the time, etc.

But no matter what you’re writing, your family is really so stinkin cute! =)

Love this post. I am constantly reminding myself that we can be used so much more effectively when we are transparent and real!

Abigail

amen!!! ;)
*Abby*

Arielle, I admire you so much. And this just made my heart so happy. Thank you for posting this! I always try to keep my posts as real as possible. Because even though we are flawed messes, Jesus is perfect and he shines brighter than we ever could. I fall, and he stands tall! I have learned through blogging that the more I am just real about my issues the more people relate and feel connected to me, but the best thing is that our connection is through Christ! It’s amazing! Gosh, I love you! And your blog. You are an amazing writer :) I always read all your post, no matter how long or short because your words are so captivating!

Definitely something we all have to be careful of, especially when it comes to blogs. A lot of them are so focused on one particular topic and so you only see the beautiful bits of lives or pretty things and that’s a piece of life, sure, but not the whole picture. We all have bad days, mess things up for ourselves, live in a messy room/house from time to time… flaws and imperfections make us human. I think it’s about time people (especially those in the body of Christ!) are more transparent and honest about everything… it’s hard sometimes, but I’m working on it myself. :)

This is one of my favorite posts from your blog. I love your blog, but I LOVE how real this one is. I try to keep things real on my blog and I find that occasionally I lose followers because of it, but if I wasn’t honest, I would feel like a phony or a fraud. Thank you for sharing this, Arielle.

Well said Arielle, this is such a tricky topic that i think most bloggers struggle with. And of course, there’s the issue of privacy which is why i think many bloggers stick to the positive. But it’s great to have a reminder now and again that we’re all just people doing the best we can, sweatpants or not ;)

SUCH a good post, and so very true! For awhile, I chose to hide how I felt about our struggle with infertility, but as it turns out, being honest has been a blessing for others. What a great reminder to “keep it real”!

so beautifully said! and what fun is life without sweatpants anyway?

Chanel

Hello, i just wanted to say that i have been reading your blog for the past few months and i have been really encouraged by what you share with us. even though i don’t know you, God has been using your blog and what you’ve been writing on here to grow me and to encourage me. so thank you for your blog and thank you for sharing some of the things that the Lord has been teaching you and showing you :)

Thanks for sharing this! I’ve been reading your blog for quite some time now and, I must say, your life seems pretty romantic and full and perfect on the outside. I know not all days can be blissful, but you’re right: on a blog it can seem to be perfect. Thanks for reminding me that Christ is the only one I need to be fixed on!

Arielle,

I am going through the same struggles that you’ve expressed lately. I’ve seen many blogs along with facebook friends toting their wonderful struggle-less life and I feel like we’re all (me included) consumed with our online personality. I’ve recently had to completely stop blogging to really think about the reasons why I started a blog and if those reasons are for myself and how it fits in bringing glory to God or if it’s is for others and their opinions.

I’m going through Proverbs right now and listening to Mark Driscoll’s (from Mars Hill Church in Seattle) sermon series. The big idea of what I’m learning about is having reverence and fear for the Lord. If you have a very high view of the Lord then in turn naturally, you have a lower view of people and their opinions. You start to live more for the Lord and understand what he wants for your life rather then what others want for your life.

Here’s a link to the sermon series if you’re interested. http://marshill.com/media/proverbs-2009

Good luck and I’ll pray for you as you figure out how a blog, business, family and God work in your life. :) Hopefully, you can pray for me as I go through this same balancing act.

I’ve read a couple of blogs of women who claim they don’t even own sweat pants, they encouraged us all to throw ours out and get really dressed up everyday, wear red lipstick around the house. One woman even said to pack a bottle when you are out of the house so that breast feeding won’t interfere with your fashion choices. I really have to laugh when i read these things because I have to wonder: what the heck are these women doing all day?!! When I am cleaning house, tending to my garden, running my dogs, chasing my girls through the yard, cooking and nursing my baby, why in the world would I do it all in heels and a dress? That’s just not practical and I think it is the most anti=feminist concept. Yes, we must take pride in ourselves (in a healthy, humble way), get dressed and feel good about the attributes God so wonderfully blessed us with. But we also have to be real, and practical. I wear scrubs to work everyday, and when I get home you’d better believe I wear what is comfortable and realistic for our busy life. And that’s what I wish people were more honest about. Great post, dear friend!!!!

there seems to be a trend among some blogs, even the Christian blogs, to focus so much on externals — home design, clothes, cute headbands, perfect family shots, etc. — and I’m so glad you came out and said, “hey, that’s really NOT what matters.” it’s not bad to enjoy life and fun family times and pretty things, but we need to all be willing to also talk about the sides of life that don’t look so good! love this post :)

I totally understand what you mean. Some people seem so perfect in their blogs, while they leave out the parts where they’re struggling.

http://oliviadollydaydream.blogspot.com/

Hi. I just stumbled upon your blog after seeing your guest post over at thewiegands.com (awesome post BTW). I love what you have to say and I can completely relate. I’m so glad I found you and I can’t wait to add you to my daily reads {no pressure} =)

Just found you today through the wiegands. Amen Sister! This is the VERY thing that has been on my heart also.

Glad to meet you! Have a blessed weekend!
Rebecca

Great post, so needed to read it. Iam trying to not worry so much about what others think about me, iam trying to fix my eyes on Christ more and less on the things of this world. Found your blog through Casey @ the Wiegand s, now following your inspirational blog

You spoke my mind exactly. LOVE that you are always so real!

well, i’m glad you wrote this – if only because now i feel better about the fact that if i am not dressed for work, i am in soccer shorts and a t-shirt. but honestly, i don’t think clothes are near as important as we make them seem, and i shouldn’t feel the need to apologize for what i wear in the comfort of my own home.

i’m also glad you wrote this because i think it’s a struggle we all face, and so one with which we can all identify. i think the struggle to be real on our blogs is really only an extension of struggling to be real in person. for instance, when we run into acquaintances or meet up with friends, we often talk about the things are going well in our lives, at the expense of that which is not. and with friends, granted, it’s a little different, for we feel freer to admit our shortcomings, disappointments, and discontent than with strangers, but i think there’s still a choice to make regarding authenticity, the choice to gloss over something or to be painfully raw in the sharing.

I love that you have such a heart to be as transparent as possible on here. The fact that you seek this willfully is so beautiful. God has really been showing me that “if I can’t do it with Him how can I do it with others?” And I haven’t really been able to go as deep with Christ the last couple of months simply because I wanted to hold back pieces of my heart. But I was really unaware because it was masked as pride and guarding my heart and all these “safety” walls. Anyways, I wrote all that to say that no matter how much I try to “be real” it truly starts at the cross and that is the beauty because only in Christ can I continually drop and break down these walls and allow people to TRULY see me and know me in Christ alone. And I just feel that you are such a wonderful example of that :)..

Okay. My novel is done.
It has been a while since I wrote you a novel though.
haha

arielle

loved reading your comment olivia!! i totally know what you mean and couldn’t agree more :) thank you for your encouragement!!!

arielle

Oh I love listening to Mark Driscoll! Thank you so much for sharing :) I will definitely have to check it out! Many blessings to you!!

SO true. Love this….and your blog.

arielle

thank you so much courtney! many blessings :)

arielle

so true, girl! thank you for sharing your heart….i couldn’t agree more. it is not easy to be super transparent but it is totally worth it :) many blessings to you dear!

arielle

thank you so much kathryn! many blessings to you :)

arielle

thank you so much megan! many blessings :)

arielle

thank you so much kirsten! :)

arielle

thank you so much for the encouragement chanel :) many blessings to you!

arielle

thank you kristen! :)

arielle

thank you gaby! :)

arielle

thank you SO much for the encouragement lori! :) many blessings!!

arielle

thank you so much for the encouragement kristen :) hope you are having a great week!

arielle

thank you for the encouragement delaney! it is truly such a blessing :) keep pressing on to know Him!

arielle

thank you bethany! :) blessings!

arielle

thank you so much nickie! :)

arielle

thank you for the encouragement!! :) many blessings to you!

arielle

thank you chelsea :) i am so thankful for the encouragement!

arielle

thank you so much for the encouragement! :) many blessings!

arielle

thank you kylie :)

arielle

thank you for the encouragement gennean! :)

arielle

thank you leigh!! :) many blessings to you lovely!

arielle

thank you tara! :)

arielle

thank you so much for the encouragement linka!! many blessings <3

arielle

thank you for the encouragement heather <3 many blessings!

arielle

i totally agree!! thank you for the encouragement :)

arielle

thank you for the encouragement carlotta :) i am blessed by reading blogs like yours! keep pressing on to know HIm <3

arielle

thank you amy! :)

LOVE this post. I often feel discontented with blogland and all it’s perfection! Love your transparency – thanks for putting voice to my thoughts! xx

very well said. life is not always perfect and our baby is not always smiling laughing..they do cry and get cranky :)

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