Sitting in my office (aka as the spare bedroom) thinking about how very soon I will be packing all of this up so that we can make room for a nursery. My desk, my workspace, the canvases, all the picture frames and supplies. We will try and arrange a makeshift “office” for me somewhere else in the house.
As I think about packing up, it makes me a little sad but I know it is for a much brighter, more beautiful reason. Although physically we are packing up a part of my business, I feel in a way that I am packing up a part of my business literally as well. I’m not going to be shutting my business down but will be taking on much less. It hurts a little bit as I’ve been saying no to weddings and will only be taking on a few next year. When I say no, I also see the extra money and opportunity go out the window. I see the money go out the window…but then I also see the time that I will have with my soon-to-be two little ones.
I know that we live in a world where women can be seen as doing it all…or having it all. But personally, for me…it is hard to keep that going for very long. If I’m focusing on working hours from home, there is a part of my life that falls to the wayside (my family.) I’m reassured that this is just a short season of me saying no and taking on less. Leland will only be small for so long. These years are very, very short. I have many years later on to focus on my business and really pour all of my heart and energy into it. I love this quote by Candice Watters:
“The nature of parenting is sacrifice. You can’t retrofit kids into your present life. If you want to be faithful, you have to fit your life around what God call you to as a mom or dad. That requires dying to yourself daily. It’s painfully hard, but it’s actually easier than trying to work in vain pursuing the illusion of having it all. You are dearly loved. ….imitate the one who loved you by laying down His life and trust in His promise that “whoever loses his life for Me will find it.” (matthew 16:25)”
This is just a season, and I know that the Lord will honor what I surrender over to Him. I know that He will bless the time I’m going to invest in our little ones. There’s a song by Watermark that says “It’s good for me to lay it down at Your feet. It is good for me to lay the good and bad in the hands of my God.” …so that is what I’m doing. Packing up and laying it all in His hands.
This is so true. I’ve sacrificed a lot for my family already but I’d much rather be home with my daughter than juggling a corporate job and I could never let someone else raise my child. I know some people are forced to use daycare so I feel especially blessed that even though my husband is still in school we’ve made financial sacrifices so that I can still stay home. Your thoughts reminded me of a quote I heard recently at a church conference from one of our leaders. I thought I’d share it with you, if you don’t mind.
“Isn’t it true that we often get so busy? And, sad to say, we even wear our busyness as a badge of honor, as though being busy, by itself, was an accomplishment or sign of a superior life. Is it?I think of our Lord and Exemplar, Jesus Christ, and His short life among the people of Galilee and Jerusalem. I have tried to imagine Him bustling between meetings or multitasking to get a list of urgent things accomplished. I can’t see it. Instead I see the compassionate and caring Son of God purposefully living each day. When He interacted with those around Him, they felt important and loved. He knew the infinite value of the people He met. He blessed them, ministered to them. He lifted them up, healed them. He gave them the precious gift of His time.” -Of Regrets and Resolutions, by Dieter F. Uchtdorf
Anyway, I loved it and it’s been a great reminder to me that simply enjoying this precious time with my young family is worth more than lengthy to-do lists. Thanks again for your words. I’m always amazed by the way you describe exactly how I’m often feeling.
I, as I’m sure you are too, am grateful that I got to marry and start a family young so that when they are grown I’ll still have time and energy to carry out personal dreams and travel with my husband :)
Well it seems that I’ve written a novel… I’m sorry. All I really meant to say was thanks. Have a beautiful day!
Love it! you can always work and have a career…your kids will only be little for such a short time…enjoy it and embrace it :)
p.s. you will surprised at how quickly you will adjust to two little one… and when you find that balance hopefully you will be able to pick up photography back up… sooner than later : )
Great post.
I am one mom that cant juggle it all either.
Ive tried both the stay at home and working mom thing.
If im the working mom I find the house and our whole family sort of gets left behind.
I find working part time gives me the perfect balance
I really really love this. It totally blessed me today, because my heart is to be a wife and mom before a businesswoman. :)
You’re such a wise young woman Arielle. As the mother of 4 grown children I often tell young mothers to cherish the time they have with their little ones because it does go by so fast. My husband & I made lots of sacrifices so that I only worked part time and was home for my children the majority of the time. As I look at them now as 4 of the most amazing young adults I know, I have not one doubt that we made the right choices (even doing that we were also able to completely pay for each of their college educations). The good news is that you’ll still be able to grow as a photographer, b/c I know you’ll never stop taking pictures- it’s a part of who you are and you’re amazing at it. In this day and age it’s a blessing also to be able to take classes and learn online (with some hot tea and a little one in your lap or playing at your feet). Have no doubt that God will bless you in so many ways (as a family and photographer) during this time because you’re seeking to do His will. Because I know you’re such a humble and selfless person, make sure that you make small periods of time for yourself to grow- through Bible Study/ photography classes/doing sessions so that mothering doesn’t take away your individuality- that’s important too ;).
And motherhood is a beautiful season :)
I have temporarily given up my other work (as a midwife) to be a stay at home mother. It’s a bit hard to see something that I worked so hard at (and love) go…but this is where I’m meant to be at the moment.
Take care sweet Arielle…your photography business will always be there for you…waiting for you when you and your family are ready. And like you say, you’ll be able to do some weddings as your little ones grow. The best of both worlds!
x
This is so, so good. I love that quote. Thank you so much for sharing. I am so thrilled for you guys xo